I cannot seem to stop myself from looking at all his mementos either. My mind is swimming with all the times we shared and how much fun we had. I still cannot understand why I was not good enough. I keep playing back through to see what it was that I did wrong and I could have given him more faith in me and in us. In his most recent letter, he conveys to still care for me and wishes to remain, friends, as we had originally intended. As tempting as this offer is, I cannot seem to fight off the desire for something more. In addition to this hopeless love that I feel, I find myself seething with anger at the fact that not once yet has he said anything to the effect of "I love you" or "I still love you." When it seemed to be no problem for him to express it in secret before. Hell, I think even an "I miss you" would suffice but instead, it has been "I still care for you," which only make me feel even more ridiculous about the way that I feel as well as disgusted with myself for allowing. ’ With your arms up I can see your heart beating, your breast moving with it. Your stomach is stretched taught and rippling as your hips continue their slow, sensuous dance against my hardness. I reach for the oil and warm it with my hands. My hands trace lightly across your forehead, your eyes, your lips grabbing and sucking at my finger when it passes by them. I have to lean forward to reach your arms, increasing the contact against your now wet outer lips. You arch your back to try to make contact with my chest and your nipples as my hands work the muscles of your upper arms, then your shoulders. I am teasing you, I know, increasing the longing in you, touching yet not touching where you want me to. I smile at that thought. Your arms move to take hold of my hands. I say ‘no’ softly and move them back. You respond with a soft whimper and lock your legs around me trying to pull me in closer. I warm the oil in my hands, rubbing them slowly, watching your eyes as they follow the.
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