Glinda listened absent-mindedly to the sound of carolers passing on the sidewalk next to her, listened to the bells jingling on the sides of the carriage of which she was an unenthusiastic passenger, listened to the horses snort and clop merrily through the snow on the asphalt. After spending her entire life in New York, the charms of the city and old-fashioned carriage rides wouldn’t raise her spirits. She shut her eyes and prayed that Christmas would just vanish. It was a similar prayer to the ones she’d murmured every December during her childhood, but maybe after eighteen years the gods would finally hear her and she would wake up long after Christmas had gone. * * * * * December 24, 1989 Dear Diary, Today Daddy died. I was out throwing snowballs with Mallory and Mommy was lying there sleeping. She was in one of her deep sleeps so she didn’t hear him fall. I feel sick and very sad. I love Daddy a lot. Maybe God will wake him up tomorrow. It’s Christmas and nothing bad can ever. Tough break. The reality is that she will probably do well in life.She only needed me as a ritual sacrifice. No doubt there were othersbefore me. No doubt that there will be more. The pistol lays stillbegging me to put it to use. The bottle harkens louder, so I paw at itfirst. Two attempts to grab the dancing target were unsuccessful, butthe third. Oh, the third attempt worked. Without any grace I throw thebottle upended over my head and let the glorious amber poison burn awaymy pain. The spinning room signals my defeat while I slip intooblivion.Rrrring!Rrrring!Turn that blasted noisemaker off, I scream in my head then grimace atthe loud screaming I did in my head. It was much too loud. Good, nowback to blessed sleep. Rrrring!Rrrring!Like an angry lion roused from his sleep, I stumble out of the couchknocking bottles and a lamp onto the floor with a cacophony of clinksand smashes. Blinding sunlight illuminates everything in the room intoa white glowing mess. My eyes.
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