’Of course I don’t mind. How would I have met such a beautiful woman and we have so much fun together. I trust you and that is something I rarely do my love.’ As I said this I pulled into a graveled driveway and sped to an old house, in front of which I drew up the car. As soon as I stopped the car two green liveried servants were beside the car and were opening the doors for us so we could step onto the path to the marble stairs. Quickly they greeted us and ushered us to through the glass doors and into a nineteenth century hall and the reception desk. ‘Good Evening Sir, you have a reservation. Of course Mr C____ your room is ready and dinner awaits sir. Would you like a drink in the saloon?” Taking the hint we moved to a wood paneled bar and gathered two drinks. Walking to the balcony we drew out two well appointed chairs and looked out on the well-manicured lawns. As we looked to the trees along the horizon the sun began to tint the few clouds into brilliant pinks and oranges.. At least I got the knowledge that my wife is a whore.”Despite the tear tracks on her cheeks, she actually had the balls to look crossly at me for this. “Please don’t let this become about name-calling! Be reasonable, please. Or at least polite.”“Hang on a sec, you voluntarily fucked and sucked and did god knows what else with that slimy fat fuck for hours on end so he wouldn’t block your promotion, which would have given you a pay raise. Which means you fucked him for a paycheque - money. That’s the very definition of whore in any dictionary you care to name. In fact, your picture may be in some of them under that entry. And I should be reasonable?”Her mouth opened and closed. I don’t think she had ever suspected this side of me. The Lord of Fucking Smash Mouth.Of course, it helped that I’d had a couple of hours to stew about it and think of a few choice phrases, while she was freshly into this conversation as soon as she let herself in the front door, with “all the shopping” she had.
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