Tarzan & Jane are swinging through the trees one day, with Tarzan repeatedly making his jungle call.Suddenly he lets out an almighty ear-splitting shriek.He turns to Jane and says "Jane, if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times ... GRAB! THE! VINE!!!"-- and two that go togetherQ: Why do elephants paint their balls red?A: So they can hide in apple trees.Q: How did Tarzan die?A: Picking apples.Building PermitSome have asked what I've been doing in retirement. Well, I applied for a building permit for a new house.It was going to be 100 ft. tall and 400 ft. wide, with 12 gun turrets at various heights, and windows all over the place and a loud outside entertainment sound system. It would have parking for 200 cars, and I was going to paint it snot green with pink trim.The City Council told me; "Forget it ... AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN!"So, I sent in the application again, but this time I called it a "Mosque."Work starts on Monday. And here is the best part, it's going to be tax. I couldn’t resist. I just mumbled ‘fuck me baby please I need it so bad.’ Then you slammed all eight inches into me nearly balls deep. I felt my face slam against the tree roots. With both hands I grasped other roots and prepared for a legendary fuck. There was no trace that you were still nervous. You just wanted to fuck me harder than ever before. I had never seen this side of you. I could feel my wet pussy gush all over your cock as you slammed in and out of me. You teased me when I knew I was getting close by pulling out and then slowly sliding back in me. At first you clutched my bouncing tits. But you know what I like. You reached under me and started rubbing my engorged clit so fast and furiously it was almost painful. Yet nothing had ever felt so good. I could feel my body tensing as an orgasm prepared to roll through me. You arched my back so you could slam your cock deep against my hard to reach g-spot without slowing down for a second as you rubbed my.
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