But whether to tell Barry... ? It then came clear to me: first we needed to know who was the father, and that would not be until after the birth. Only then, and only if Barry was the father would we need to face the other dilemma. Cross bridges when you come to them.Helen had been sitting patiently waiting for some response from me.I think I had my ducks in row.“So,” I began. “One, The baby will be born and brought up by us regardless. Two, we are together whether or not the baby is mine. Three, we do not know whose the baby is, and won’t until after the birth, and only if Barry is the father do we then need to face the question of what we do about that. Four, now we know you’re pregnant, we need to find a place to live.”This got a wide smile from her and she came and sat next to me on the bed, hugging herself to my side.“Helen,” I said. “I am going to assume I am the father until proved otherwise. In any case, it will be our baby.”“Do we need to get married?” she asked, rather. "I'm going over to your place tomorrow. Hopefully I'll get lucky. It's been moving right along. Another day or two and you should have your evidence. Make sure you have my money ready." Don't worry, I have the money. Just see to it that you have the video or some really good pictures," he laughed.I did go and see Julie on Saturday. She told me that Bob would be out of town and John was staying over at a friend's house. Julie and I were sitting on the sofa and I had my arm around her."Russ, it's getting harder and harder being with you and not having you. I've gone way too far with you already. I'm fighting myself with my own body. My fantasies and lust for you are getting out of control. I'm ready to just say 'Hell with it' and make love to you. Please tell me you feel the same." There is nothing I want more than to make love to you. I have been thinking of you almost every waking hour. I can't wait for this farce of a marriage to end so we can be together. I know I've only been back.
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