I trust you can all swim.” She doesn’t wait for an answer, but moves on down the manicured grass. Away to the left I notice a lawn tennis court, and a life-sized chessboard. This place really does tick every country house cliché. Croquet too, perhaps? It takes us a couple of minutes to cross the expanse of lawn, and I’m startled to see how far away the house looks when I check over my shoulder. I want so badly to tell Mum about this amazing place and the treatment we’re getting. Since I got dressed in Miss Jackson’s office it’s been a thoroughly respectable lunch and walk about the ground, and I have almost forgotten what I’m here for. But of course I can’t tell Mum. She’d flip out. No, she wouldn’t even understand what I was saying. The vegetation thickens now as we move down the garden, growing more haphazard. There are a couple of large elm trees, and a couple of mulberry bushes with reading benches beneath. Suddenly I am not sure which way to look. “That wooden building up. . but all mine ever says is good-bye.You’re not fat, you’re just easier to see.If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, “Here, fill this out?”I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, “Sag Harbor.”My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I’m pretty sure she was hitting on me.My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I’m worried about the 175 pounds I’ve gained since then.Denny’s has a slogan, “If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us.” If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s going to get me something.The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.I think it’s pretty cool.
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