“Doorbell!”As I heard my mother’s footsteps approaching, I quickly pulled my fingers away from my wet kitty. Ever since that first time in front of the TV, I’d been unable to keep my hands away from my privates. Whether I was watching something, scrolling through social media, or just hanging out in my room, I was always playing.I guess it’s the ... what did Dr. Williamson call it? The “teenage libido”.Changing body and all that.My brow furrowed slightly at the thought. Something about that wasn’t right, but before I could really think about what it was, the doorbell rang again.“Mom!”“I’m coming,” she cried out. I felt a pang of guilt - I knew how excited she was about this date. She’d been primping herself for like ten hours, just getting ready.I’d assured her fifty million times that yes, her tits looked fine in the black top that she’d picked out. I say “top” - it was more like a corset. It had looked great on me, and of all the outfits that Mom had “borrowed”, it was defs one of. Brandishing his weapon, he snuck around the dumpster, ready to strike. There sprawled on the sacking was a tiny person in disheveled clothing, less two feet tall. To his chest, with tiny arms, he clutched a whisky bottle and a black iron pot filled with bright yellow gold nuggets. It could only be a leprechaun.It was a fantasy Jim had had since the day he entered Ireland, so he didn't pause a moment for thought. He reached out and snatched the pot of gold with a lightening motion that had it in his hands before the bat clattered to the ground.He looked to the leprechaun to see if he would wake.Indeed, he did stir, eyes still closed, groping with his empty hand for the pot and instead grabbing his breast. His breast? Jim did a double take. The wee person was, in fact, female. A deeply ugly female, but a female nonetheless."A lady leprechaun?" Jim wondered aloud. All the stories of wee folk had always indicated they were men."An' howrya thinkin' leprechauns be makin' more leprechauns,.
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