Getting to skip my period and never get pregnant would make my life so much easier, and the promised technology of a super fast computer and a cell phone that would always be charged was definitely fantasy fodder.But after that I started to get a little....greedy. I let my fetishes steer the wheel a tiny bit, and ended up also picking out a Perfect Disguise, which would make me unrecognizable to even my closest friends, and a Rubber Constitution, which would make rough sex so much less painful. And those went so well with the Boon of Social Ambivalence, which would make it so that everything I did was totally normal, no matter how weird or illegal it was. And then? I didn't really have an excuse for also requesting the summonable strap-on that gave real sensations and could shape shift and expel liquid on command. Or the ability to make people horny by staring at them.And I ended up in debt, which meant I had to take on curses, curses that I didn't want to deal with, but that were. Oh, what a profound thought for a child to take him into the complex world of rationalization. Today I still have uncomfortable thoughts about ghouls, vampires and headless horsemen. Also objects in space hurtling in to collide with earth and destroy us all. Then there are the worries of a return of prehistoric creatures, volcanoes, tidal waves, pox, bird flu, fatal car crashes, an out of control mother-in-law and, as a journalist, being tarred and feathered and run out of town. But Virginia, the point here is that my wife apparently still considers I’m cute and that she married above herself (just joking), that I’m okay despite my weird thoughts and she believes and I pose no threat to our children, or neighborhood or indeed the entire world. Our two trust me, implicitly I believe, and if I pulled them out of their gang of friends setting off to acknowledge Halloween tomorrow there would have been stamping and crying but I would have still received the familiar ‘I love you daddy’.
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