One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary guy” he said to her “but in just a few years, my father will die and I will inherit $200 million”. Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother. Women are so much better at financial planning than men.What do you call a white woman with a yeast infection? Cracker with cheese.“Dad is it better to pass or fail?” “To pass of course” “Oh good you’ll be proud of me! I passed my pregnancy test”Two life-long friends were enjoying a few pints down their local bar, when one said to the other “If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me honestly?” “Yeah, sure thing” replied his friend “fire away”. “Well” said the first guy “why do you think all the guys around here find my wife so attractive?” “It’s probably because of her speech impediment” replied the second guy.. He plowed through the week and in one of his few magnanimous spells, postponed all the work that he had originally scheduled to be due on Friday until the next Monday. The kids were overjoyed since he never cut them any slack when it came to schoolwork.During that time, he only briefly spoke to Ann Marie. They flirted a little, but were otherwise professional to the point that it seemed like they were ignoring each other.When the final bell rang on Friday afternoon, most of the people in the school left immediately. The football team was off for a week before the sectional playoffs began. No one wanted to be at school once the weekend started.Jake scurried about his room, straightening up the desks, picking up a little bit of trash and even setting up for the following Monday. If things panned out the way he hoped, he wasn't going to get much work done between now and then anyway.Half an hour after the last bell rang, Jacob heard a knock at his door. He looked up and saw Ann Marie.
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