’ Again I had to refocus. Stop thinking about Jevon and the window! ‘Oh. No. It’s fine. Really.’ I was hoping we could change the subject away from my job. ‘But what about you just enjoy your summer before you start up studies in the fall?’ ‘Oh I will enjoy it Daddy. I’ll still have plenty of time for my friends. Cindy and Beth and you know all the girls. Really.’ See I knew not to mention Julian, just the girls. It’s the right way to go with Daddy. Not like he hates Julian – who is only the number one love in my entire life and I would and have been (pat on back for me!) doing everything and anything to make him happy – I mean not exactly like he hate-hates him but I think it bothers him that I might, you know, have some physical relations from time to time with Julian. And he thinks I’m still just this little girl even now I’m 18. For goodness sake! ‘Time for the girls? I should hope so. You should see them more often, maybe have Cin over.’ Did he usually call her ‘Cin’ like that?. Maybe even quit entirely someday."I stared at her, my mouth agape. "Honey, that wasn't what I asked for! I..."She placed a finger on my lips. She smiled serenely at me. "Shhh. It's okay, Hawk. I never would have offered it as long as you demanded it, but you trusted me - loved me enough to ask. I've never had anyone love me that much before. My clients will have to learn to live without me in their beds." Honey, I do love you, but I don't understand," I said. "Still, I don't think you need to make radical, life-altering decisions like this on the spur of the moment. Let's just go with things as they are for a few months and then talk about it again."Gretchen said nothing for a moment and then nodded. "Okay. We said we would find someplace to start letting the other inside our walls. This is as good as any. You see, all my life, someone was telling me what I had to do, how I had to behave. When I was a kid, it was my mother and father and I did what they wanted, what they told me to.
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