I had taken my family to the river for a day of tubing in ice cold water, the one place my tiny pee wee measured up in man size. So here I stood in line waiting my turn to rent tubes with my 12 year old son. The guy in front of us was standing, talking, and joking with two very beautiful young ladies. I was listening as he was telling them a joke and they laughed and so did I. He pushed both women aside as he put his hand on my chest and asked me what the fuck was I laughing at. I just thought the joke was funny too. He raised his voice as told me that I had no right’s to listen in on their conversation. I immediately told him I was so sorry for interrupting him. He was shorter than me by a few inches but was heavily muscled up and when he got right in my face, I could feel myself cowing down to him. We were inside this large barn sized structure where they keep these tire tubes for tubing and maybe there was 60 or more people inside and more outside. He orders me in this almost very. " I like being human, thanks."He looked sad, a feat for not actually having any facial features, "I'm human too, if you prick my skin, do I not bleed?" he asked."No, your skin is two centimeters thick." My genes only differ from yours by about two point five percent." And a monkey by only about one point eight percent."He made a harrumphing sound that was the closest thing to actually speaking; he blew air out of his mouth and shaped it past his thin, almost useless lips. "Luckily our species is accepting." Right," I said, "which is why you live in an abandoned warehouse and have no job." And so kind of my only friend to remind me every day that I am a lesser human."Now I felt bad, "You know that's not what I meant, I'm sorry," I hesitated for a second, "I just hate the world we live in." Then join the Insurrection." He paused dramatically and looked thoughtful, "Oh wait, we killed them all." You know your jokes might be better if you used a different voice, maybe something with.
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