I'm so sorry but I'm just not.Um, here’s a little bit about what I NEED to have happen when we first meet if you want me to be as relaxed as I possibly could with you because the more relaxed I am, the more pleasure you can derive from me … After you answer the door and invite me in, you'll politely ask if I would like anything to drink. I'll think for a second and begin to answer by saying, "Um ..." but you'll quickly interrupt me and say something like, “Turn around, I want to look at you!" As I do as I'm told, you'll start unbuckling and unzipping your pants, eventually taking them off. As you begin stroking your cock, getting it all nice and hard, you'll then say something like, "Turn around again for me but this time go slower, I want to get a real good look at you!" Again, I'll do as I'm told but just as my back is to you, you'll order me to stop and to lift the back of my skirt for you. When I do, you'll briefly caress my cheeks and then tell me to bend over and grab my. And he wuz well liked by the fans in Cleveland, but him and me didn’t get along on account of what happened when we wuz both with the Phillies in 1900. ‘See, a player ain’t supposed to fuck with another player’s bats. That’s an unwritten rule in the game. Well he fucked with mine and pissed me off. I threw a haymaker at him and of course I missed him. But I didn’t miss the wall behind him and broke several bones in my right hand. Besides that, he liked to holdout every year, so as to miss part of spring training. And now I wuz the manager of the Cleveland team and him trying to sit out spring training didn’t sit too well with me. But he had led the league in hitting in ’05, and in triples three straight years, ’05, ’06, and ’07, and he wuz a damn good base stealer to boot. ‘Okay, that’s one side of the picture. Now, the Tigers had Cobb, but remember, he wuz only a kid breaking into the big leagues. We knew he could hit, but his demeanor left something to be desired. He kept getting.
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