He had a puzzled look on his face as he said Who are you and how do you know my name? "It's me, Kylie," I said stammering over my words. His eyes instantly lit up. "Oh my goodness I haven't seen you since you had glasses, braces and pig tails! Time has certainly been good to you," he said as he slowly examined my body. "Thanks," I said as I blushed. "Can I come in?" "Sure," he said as his eyes shot back up to mine.The house still looked exactly how I remembered it. "I'm guessing she's upstairs?" I said in a smart tone. "Actually she's at her girlfriend's house. I was just watching a movie on the couch. You can join me if you like?" he said seductively. Who would I be to turn down watching a movie with my childhood crush? There was only one couch so he sat on one end and I sat on the other. The movie was kind of long so I lay down but I couldn't seem to get comfortable. "You can lay your head on my lap if that would help," he said still glued to the TV. Thinking he was just being nice. In addition,the vibrations that come from it when I use it are amazing. So amazing, that sometimes I use it even when I don't need a trim. I even use it back there so now I'm perfectly groomed around both holes which my girlfriend, Emily, loves because now she can stick her tongue in my.Whoa! I'm gonna stop reading here. Santa's not too keen on that kind of tongue activity no matter how well groomed it is. Claire, I'm sure you're a nice girl, but that's so naughty, Santa might have to skip your house next Christmas. Anyway,thanks for writing. Our next letter comes from Jay who lives in New York.Dear Santa, you brought my girlfriend, Sarah, a vibrator last Christmas for which I've got one thing to say to you. Who the Hell do you think you are bringing a vibrator to a woman without including any batteries to run the damn thing? Poor Sarah was so desperate to get off, she tried to plug it into the cigarette lighter in her car, accidentally shifting the gear, causing it to roll downhill.
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