He Looked like a woman. Smelled like a woman. Danced like a woman. Even kissed like a woman, but as we arrived back at his apartment he reversed his car into a tight parking slot in one fluid movement... ! That’s when I thought “Wait a f’ing minute...”In the Pub the other day I was telling that old joke about what you do if you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath. Answer; throw in your washing.We were all having a good laugh about this, when this big bastard tapped me on the shoulder and said “I don’t find that very funny. My brother was an epileptic and he died in the bath during one of his fits...”I said “Sorry mate. Did he drown?”“No,” he said, “he choked on a sock.”The wife came out of the bathroom and said “I have just shaved my bits and you know what that means don’t you?”I said “Yeah, the bloody plug hole is blocked again.”An Arab diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was not used to the salt in. I had a long bath, taking my own time; I was dressed very casually, free from all unnecessary under clothing and felt like a free lark. When I went to my room and picked up my child I found she was running slight fever. I thought it would go away, but soon it intensified, and shortly I found she was having convulsions. I was frightened. Not knowing what to do, not knowing anyone there, or where a doctor could be found, I rushed to this gentleman’s flat, and while I rang the bell, saw the name plate with his name MOHAN RAM on it. He opened the door and when he saw me he was a bit surprised and asked me if I needed anything. I told him what was happening asking him to help me as I was scared. He came into my flat and went into the bedroom and saw the child in that state. He asked me to get water and ice and a napkin, and sitting next to it he started swabbing it continuously. From his mobile, he called the chemist and asked them to rush Crocin drops, and also called his doctor who.
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