I asked him if he wanted some water and he said yes, I went back to my room and he followed me to my room and the movie was still running and he commented that this black guy has a lot of power. I told him my trivia on black men and told him that they have huge cocks and they have power to fuck for hours at an end. He sat down and asked me if I had some regular porn movie he would like to borrow it from me as his wife was pregnant and he had not had sex in a long time, this was like the situation that the bait walked to the lions on his own, I told him I had a lot of them and can play it if he wanted to watch it here as those movies will not play on his dvd player at home as they were downloads from the net. He agreed to it by saying he does not have any other tasks to do in the day and was free.I pop a str8 porn dvd into the computer and it starts to play, it is a black on white again and this gal with huge boobs is being used by this black guy and it is a good movie, he tries to. Some of it is hindsight. I am so ashamed of my actions and my feelings from the time before the thirty days started. The thirty days were difficult but so guilt ridden."I had felt invincible. I was the star of the C-130 training. I was the hottest woman there with a totally hot guy who I thought worshipped me. What I didn't know was that he loved me enough to let me go. I also didn't know that he was enough of a person that he didn't and doesn't need someone to congratulate him on how well he does, or did. I need positive reinforcement. I was blind to the fact that he had long since stopped trying to pass the training."I was running over everyone. Vic and Tom couldn't bring themselves to stop me from hurting others. My father dropped the training to keep from losing his love for me. That should have opened my eyes but it didn't. Finally, I humiliated Charles publicly and he decided to force the issue. He had wanted to leave because he didn't like where things were going. My actions.
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