It was at thatmoment that I realized that I could never accept myself in her form,especially knowing I was the one who was responsible for her death.Gradually, I pulled myself from the floor and made my way to myapartment door.Down the hall and to the right was a door, I slowly and deliberatelymade my way to it. Opening it ever so slowly - so it wouldn't make asound, I stepped onto the stairs and pulled it closed behind me.Gradually I made my way up in the inky darkness, reaching my handsforward and feeling - searching for the door.My hand bumped the handle, giving it a turn it opened out to the roof ofmy apartment building. I was in turmoil, feeling so guilty for stealingher young form - intent to end my life. I paused at the rail and lookeddown the several floors to the ground. Trembling uncontrollably for whatI was about to do, I felt my knees buckle and this caused me to drop tothe roof.Again I was assailed by a fit of tears. Off in the distance, thunderrolled. I folded my hands. Katie stood shivering in the cold, wearing an old worn jacket and knitted gloves.“Hi, come in. Can I take your jacket?”I surmised that Nattie told her my address.She nodded, followed by a quiet, “yes, please.” The shortest of the three brunettes stuffed her mittens in the pocket before handing it off to me, to hang in the front hall closet.The jacket was too light for a long Chicago winter. I held my frown in.I didn’t comment on my guest showing up unexpectedly in the exact same outfit she wore the previous evening. Green fluffy sweater, painted-on bleached blue jeans and worn sneakers.“I’m making dinner; leftover pizza and chef salad. Care to join me?”“Okay.”Her reticence was expected. What her goal was, I would let her tell me when she was ready. I didn’t think it would be simple. I did remember that she had the highest intelligence of the trio.We ate in silence. Katie picked at her meal, barely finishing one slice of pizza, not the crust, and a small bowl of salad. The can of Coke.
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