She had higher standards then that. Daniella shivered and remembered the old saying that when you shiver someone is walking over your grave. She smiled at the morbidity of the thought but then frowned. It was her mother who had told her this. She did not want to remember her mother right now but her mind, empty of thoughts, was brought back to her more happy times. She was so caught up in trying to forget her memory that she did not notice a man sitting next to her. She looked over and couldn’t help but create a stereotypical opinion of him. He looked to be in his forties with thinning gray hair and a thick beard. His beard was dark brown with strands of white and gray throughout. He was wearing a dark blue winter coat that had salt stains on the arms. She glanced down and saw dark pants with big brown boots. He had no hat or mitts. ‘It’s cold outside isn’t it?’ Daniella was surprised he had started a conversation. Once she got over her opinion that he was homeless, dirty, and not. And eventhough my life was still at its lowest ebb, I was determined to be thevery last to leave the forthcoming annual office party because I somehowsensed that Siobhan would definitely be there in spirit with me as well.I did feel a little better for going afterwards even though I hardly spoketo anyone as I knew they must all know by now who I was and deliberatelyleft me alone. Then finally with one last long unhappy look around theempty room full of Christmas wrappers, streamers and empty wine bottlesheaded straight for the nearest pub.I seem to remember leaving sometime after 11 definitely very drunk andsoon soaked to the skin in the driving rain, too content to just wanderthe cold dark streets alone which only made things worse.Suddenly I felt a warm draft of air coming out of a small brightly litshopping arcade and instinctively drawn I suppose like a moth to light,with perhaps the chance of a little human Christmas warmth now that evenBrendan had gone, I wandered in vaguely.
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