In thisworld here, I have no one to truly relate to or be loved by. I'm toodifferent. Not different in the "special" sort of way, but just thatwhat I liked and what I did didn't match what people expected of me. Mythoughts didn't match the rest of the world's ideas about how everythingshould be. I even questioned myself. In many ways, I just didn't knowwhat to think or do, both for myself and to others around me. I guessthat's the reason why I'm so indifferent, because I don't know what todo with my life or the life of others.I reached my second class, which was English. I was indifferent aboutthat subject too. I simply did my homework and class work and that wasit. No groaning on how boring it was or internal dialogue saying howgreat of a writer I could be. I simply did it, maybe got a C+ or a B-and that was it. I went to the very back where no one looked, which waswhere my seat was. When the class filled up, people started to look atme again. I didn't notice though, I was still in. Tran, Alexandra, get dressed and come to my office."Ricardo interjected, "Hey, watta bout me. Don't I get to fuck the other one?" It's late, and she knows what she's doing. Here, go get yourself laid." He handed Ricardo a couple of twenties.Ricardo looked at me fiercely. "I'll see you some other time, bitch." I look forward to that, so sorry it didn't work out today," I replied mildly. I had no interest in getting fucked by a stringy little guy like Ricardo, but why piss him off? I accompanied Tran to the dressing room, feeling a little guilty about my role in getting her into this predicament and in helping Pavel carry it out. I was also nervous about the real thing the next day. "Are you OK with that?" Sure, it was fine. He wasn't any rougher than some of my real clients. And it was sexy hearing you read my lines. It helped me get through it." "How weird is that, getting fucked in front of a bunch of spectators?" Tran shrugged. "You know, there'll be a lot more tomorrow." I didn't.
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