The house was owned by a pair of lesbians who needed a lodger to help with the last bit of the bills, but so far had only found homophobes or horn dogs trying to get into their pants. Because I was neither of these, and I managed to help out with little household chores, they absolutely adored me and I could get away with pretty much anything, including a mildly psychotic ex-girlfriend. ‘That’s very generous of you, but I wouldn’t want to impose.’ ‘Oh don’t worry. There’s plenty of space.’ ‘Still…’ She was unsure. ‘How about this, I give you my number and address, and if you don’t find anyone, you can come crash on my couch? If I don’t hear from you, I’ll assume you’ve found something better.’ I quickly scribbled my number and address on a random piece of paper I managed to pull from my pocket and offered it to her. ‘Sure…’ She accepted the scrap of paper, to my surprise, somewhat eagerly. ‘Care to get a late night snack? Coffee or something?’ I suggested. ‘You just gave me your. No one controls me.”“Yes, I know and although it is hard for me I think I understand it better now. Ronnie. Why won’t you go to the councillor with me? I think she can help you. She has been a great help to me in understanding myself and my emotions.”“Ron, I’ve already told you that being in control is important to me. Why would I want to go to someone who wants to take that away from me?”“That is not what they do, Ronnie. This lady I’m seeing just talks you through everything.”“So they want to know all about your life. What are they, Weirdoes?”“They have to understand to give you advice. That’s all. This lady I’m going to just listens and asks questions. She doesn’t make judgments or tell you that anything has to happen. She is just someone who listens and gives feedback on what options or decision seem possible to her. Occasionally she allows me to understand why people do what they do, something that is not always clear to me.”“So she tells you why I fucked Joe, is that it.”“No.
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