Bridget held onto Sian’s hand as they made their way through the crowd. It wasn’t packed but it was still fairly full. Finally against the back wall, Sian saw her friends and waved. Once they were seated, Sian introduced Bridget around. There were two couples. One was Kate and Liesl. They were both about Sian’s age. It didn’t take too long for Bridget to learn that Kate was a friend of Sian’s from back in high school. The other couple was Zach and Hill. They were both massage therapists and Hill had met Sian a number of years ago when she was recovering from a fall skiing. She still saw him at least once a month. The other two women were single and looking, as they made clear. Tempest was a quiet and tiny woman who was very pretty in a pixie-like way whereas Viola was a larger woman. Bridget didn’t like stereotyping but she thought to herself that it wasn’t too hard to guess she was lesbian. She was surprised at what a lovely voice Viola had. It didn’t go with the larger body. As the. Over time though I stopped fooling myself.If I'm honest with myself, I got into it simply for the attention and to be desired. I'm not being overly critical of myself, just honest, when I say I'm a very plain looking person. Nothing wrong with it, simply the way some of us are. The spots I went to were visited by either gay men or straight/bi men. The gay men of course had no interest in me. The bi men though, many of them were my age and older. Many were married. Many had a non existent sex life at home. Almost all kept what they did quiet and were just as worried about people who knew them finding out. So although it was scary it also felt safe in a weird way.Although with most there was very little, if any, talking, some you got to know, at least a little. Even the ones you didn't talk with you recognized their faces and they recognized yours. You might see them at the mall or a restaurant or a community event and there would be this moment of recognition and nervousness and fear.
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