"Could you please knock it off?" I would reply. But ask and ask againhe did. He kept asking. And asking and asking. I was getting at mywit's end.After, hmm, I'd say about three months of his nagging, but it mighthave been four and, yes, it was in fact nagging (don't tell me that mencan't nag too), I finally flared: "Why do you want me to do this?" Myvoice was loud. My exasperation was plain. My contempt was visible."It'll make me feel good. They say it's allows the best and deepestorgasm ever," he answered, the embarrassment and the longing evident onhis scrunched up, pathetic face.That selfish shit: me, me, me, me, me. Always about him. Always abouthis pleasure, his desires, his wants. I thoroughly believed that healso saw his desire as somehow degrading me. I was inclined to agreewith him.No right-thinking wife wants to put her finger up her husband's ass andrub his prostate until he comes. My finger up there. It's dirty. It'sfilthy. And what if he farts? Or has an involuntary.... . well... no... in that case...” and backed slowly away from me.At midnight, the O’Lochrin women made their appearance. They signaled for the music to stop and said loudly, “It is midnight, time to bring Jack O’Lantern to life.”That really got my attention.The older of the two women was holding a huge turnip with the root still attached. The body of the turnip had been carved into a grotesque face with a small mouth and eyes that reminded me of the hollow sockets of a skull. The younger woman went over to the fireplace and returned holding a glowing ember in a pair of small tongs. She placed it in the hollowed-out turnip and suddenly the eyes glowed orangish-red. When the older woman placed the top back on the turnip, I could see small wisps of smoke coming from vents in the lid. She held the old-style Jack O’Lantern high above her head and said loudly, “Halloween has officially begun.”The carved turnip is actually a very good design. The heat of the ember creates a draft like a.
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