I wish I could’ve seen more of the city,” Hailey responded closing her now empty suitcase.“That’s a shame. Can I ask you something Hailey?” Grace questioned.“Sure. What’s up?” Hailey said focusing more of her attention on the conversation.“I have a crush on someone, but I’m nervous. What should I do?” Grace inquired with a shield of trickery clouding her question.“Who’s the lucky guy?” Hailey asked sitting down on her bed and sarcastically putting her elbows on her knees and grabbing both sides of her face. Her expression, while mostly genuine, was a little disconcerting to Grace who was trying to lightly test the waters. Grace looked unamused by Hailey’s outward appearance, and her response caused Hailey to relax her stance.“It’s okay Grace, you don’t have to tell me who it is. How long have you had a crush on him?” she asked with a more relaxed demeanor.“It was more a recent realization, but we have been friends for a while,” Grace replied sitting down on the bed next to. Do you dream you are with me?’ And I turn my head, and I open my eyes, and I peer into the darkness where she lay… once lay. And I can smell the musky stain of her body, giddy, replete, and see her skin glowing, and feel her stretched-out heat beneath the bed-sheet. When was that? Did we ever have that? How many nights since she lay beside me? I try to remember. It must be hundreds. I lay on my back and I stare wide-eyed trying to cleaver the darkness, trying to part the way until the dawn. I can’t sleep, mustn’t sleep. If I sleep she’ll call me. And I’m afraid to see her… can’t face her now… What could I say? How would I explain… I work my tongue across secretion-crusted lips acrid from smoke and beer. Does she know I’m smoking now? Does she know I’m drinking again? Is she watching? She stifles a nervous laugh but I don’t look… there will be no sparkling eyes, no soft parted lips waiting to be kissed, no warm embrace… no forgiveness… ‘You shouldn’t be smoking. You promised. Why.
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