She says she understands what I talk about, but she can't really. No one can. Sometimes, it's like I will explode and all the pieces of me will fly apart to lay scattered on the ground. I don't know where all this will end. I think I will end some day and then things will be peaceful again.It's been three months now... three months since Mark and I talked to Doctor Jamison in her office. I'm better now. I'm not afraid anymore when Doctor Jamison wants to put me into what she calls a light trance. She can do that very quickly now. She doesn't snap her fingers or anything like that stuff you see on stage, but I can focus so much better now and she can ask anything she wants. I'm not embarrassed by anything she might dredge up anymore. She's found so much and later, when she brings me out of it, she makes me discuss whatever she talks with me about when I'm under.Sometimes, when I just talk about it outside of deep relaxation, it goes away like it never was actually there to begin with.. " You mean fuck?" Yes," and she shivered as I stroked the inside of her thigh. "That's a horrible word, but it sounds so bloody sexy when you say it."I put my lips right up to her ear,"Fuck, fuck, fuck, I want to taste your beautiful little cunt again, Mandy." Oh God, Annie." I want to lie on my back and watch as you lower your sweet little cunt down onto my face." You're making me all wet." Good, that's how I want your cunt Mandy, all wet and fucking juicy while I fuck it with my tongue."Her mother interrupted us then with a knock on the door and she breezed in with two large plates full of delicate little sandwiches and a large jug of orange juice."Are you staying tonight Annie?" she asked politely and Mandy answered for me."Yes mummy, if that's all right." Oh good, I'll bring you your supper up later. Daddy's going to the pub in a bit and I'm going to get ready for Jane. She and I are good friends you know, Annie." That's what I was talking about," Mandy said when her mother had.
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