Obviously I enjoyed it too, but, most important, you’ll be able to remember this when you need a fantasy – or a memory – when you’re with Richard and can’t get excited enough. Now, we’ll have to do something to build up you Lyle fantasies. They’re really fantasies, not memories as you have with Judy…or me. Memories are good, but the nice thing about fantasies that you can build on them. You can do things in them that you would never do in real life. However, fantasies probably are best if they’re based on a real starting point like Lyle feeling you in the pool. ‘You’ve done a good job of building on that in the two fantasies you described to me. However, you said that your Lyle fantasies didn’t function at all last night and we need to work on that. We want to open you up to more than just the Judy – or Katie – memories and those Lyle fantasies are good ones. Now, as I told you before, hypnosis can only go so far in enhancing your fantasies, so we need to make those more real so. The pain of not having you, not being yours. And you dreaming of me but denying yourself as usual. Our dreams, though, never listened to our brains.I drove here in the middle of the night, half sobbing, half dreaming the entire forty-five-minute drive. I had sent you a single message, with a single word. Lindenwood. You didn’t respond. I sat in the parking lot, trying in vain to push all these yearnings out in the form of ink on paper. How was I supposed to let us go when every fiber of me was telling me that what we have is right?Deeply aroused and mildly broken, I got out of my car only to remember how inappropriately I was dressed. Just a tank top and shorts. Nothing underneath. In the dead hours of the morning in a shady area of this big town, anything could happen to me and no one would even know. I walked to the sign-in booth and signed my name. My real name. Forcing this dream into reality.I walked the same path you and I had walked previously. Thinking only good thoughts..
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