. And whilst he’s not as good to look at as Charley, he does a pretty decent job. “When I finally realised what was going on right next to my bedroom, I couldn’t stop thinking about my girlfriend being on the other side of that wall...”Cut to footage of Janine, sitting on some stairs, looking a little shy, smiling up toward the camera as she gives her side of the story. “We were snuggled up on the couch watching UK of Zoo, ‘avin’ a bit of a kiss, and Steve tells me that he thinks the old guy next door does ‘this kind of thing’ ... And then I suddenly remembered that whenever I saw Albert outside his house, or walking Stan down to the shops, he’d always ask me questions...”Back to Albert, on the couch, talking to camera – “I’ll always ask a girl, ‘Do you like dogs?’ or ‘Are you a doglover?’ ... Or I’ll say ‘Do big dogs scare you?’ It’s a great way to start a conversation – if they aren’t interested you can tell right away, and they don’t suspect a thing – it’s just an old bloke. With that, I finally gotthe only decent paying job I could find: A Hooter's waitress. Don'tlaugh, women with bodies like mine make lots in tips at a place likethat. But after a few months of that, a customer gave me a businesscard for a strip club he owned and I showed up there for an audition. Iwas hired on the spot. It turns out that while bimbos are clumsy atjust about everything they try - I couldn't program a VCR to save mylife - we're excellent at anything that has to do with our appearanceand turning guys on. I went right to work humping the pole, grinding myhips, shaking my breasts, flipping my hair, etc.But the problem was, everything I did for my appearance or to turn guyson, basically occupied my thoughts completely. It's like I was losing awar with my own mind. I'd start looking at a magazine of hair styles atthe salon and end up spending hours there, discussing shades of blonde,different cuts, etc., with women who acted as stupid as I spoke.After coming home at 2 a.m..
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