I guess that's why I didn't back away from Dawney's suggestion — even though maybe I should have. Joe always seems pleased to get home and sorry to leave, but in between? I very much needed to keep myself busy.Dawney encouraged me into pursuing a PhD and helped me choose a research area. I shouldn't have agreed to take on something that was so close to Dawney's own area, but I needed a supervisor and the professor had always been very supportive. Now though, things were getting difficult and it was becoming worse as a result of the direction my research was taking. When Dawney suggested the topic, I should have recognised the problems that could arise, especially the fact that it was bound to venture into areas where Dawney was considered the authority. But, I didn't.The basic idea was to explore the relationship between stress and play; analysing the role that play has in reducing stress. I thought it presented an exciting research opportunity. It was only as the work progressed,. What did I think, that he'd be out there waiting for me to walk by? Sometimes I can be a real dork!Still, I kept hoping he'd be there, like maybe he'd come out to get the mail or something. I must have walked around the block three times, and even after that I paced up and down the block a half a dozen more times, studying his house, sending thought messages, hoping he'd come out. There were grass clippings on the sidewalk, I noticed, so he must have mowed the lawn, which meant he'd already mowed, so he wouldn't be coming out for that. It smelled good, sweet and succulent.Is succulent the right word? I wished I was taking Mr. Turner's creative writing class with Carl.Finally, screwing my courage to the sticking point, my heart hammering, my mouth dry, I went up the walk and rang the doorbell, hoping maybe Carl would like to go for a walk with me.I kept asking myself what I was afraid of. The worst he could do was tell me to go away, right?The brave man (or woman) dies but once, the.
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