I mean of course theres been times where Ive thought I might be but I soon realised it was more lust than anything. I get a lot of attention – at 5ft 8 with long light brown hair, tanned olive skin and the classic hourglass figure I get the feeling most men arent looking for a relationship when they look at me. I wouldnt say Im beautiful nor would I call myself ugly but with a largish nose Ive never been the prettiest of girls. My big eyes and large mouth balance out my nose but its always been something Ive never been completely happy with. Most men that capture my attention are tall, dark and handsome and when I say dark I mean dark. As a teen I always had a thing for black and mixed raced guys I still do but now my types a little more open and personality attracts me more than anything. After graduating university I bought my own space and started my cake making business which had nothing to do with my degree in psychology. As a teenager in college and university I did some crazy. ”“Mary darling, it’s called bereavement. I’m allowed to be miserable, it’s in the rules.”“But you’re wasting away. You’re not eating properly are you?”“There’s no fun in cooking for one, Mary. I’m eating enough.”“No you’re not. We’ve been talking, and we’re worried about you.”“You mean you and Lizzie are.”“And the boys. We all think you need a change. Why don’t you go and visit Aunt Ellen or Uncle George? School’s are off for a week from next weekend, so you’ll have time. Or why not go and see John Pollard? I’m sure he’d love to have you.”“Not John.” Claire’s response was clipped.“Why ever not?” Mary asked, surprised at her mother’s reaction.“I’ve imposed on John enough already. I can’t keep landing my troubles on him all the time. It’s too much.”“Mum, John would–”“No Mary,” she said sharply. “I might go see Ellen, Simon and the children. John has his own life without having to put up with misery-me yet again.”Mary knew her mother too well to argue further, thinking that even a trip.
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