The afternoon was actually no better than the morning, I struggled toconcentrate, the chastity thing and the clothes continually distractingme. Also to be honest, I was always half expecting the dreaded pop upchat screen to appear at any time. It was very unnerving andsuspenseful, but it wasn't until around 4 o'clock that that finallyhappened."Time to go shopping girl."I brought my trembling fingers back to the keys. "Yes Sir." Turn on your cam girl, I want it on each time I call you from now on."I nervously did as I was told, I hated being on live cam in front ofhim, I felt vulnerable, unhidden, revealed."Good girl, now have you looked at your shopping list yet."I shook my head "no Sir." Then do so now, so that you are aware of what to look for."I picked up the sheet from the printer and started to read it.6 Pairs of nylon panties. I could feel my tummy tightening what the hellwas this?3 bras, one white, one black, one coloured. I began to tremble.3 pairs of knickers, if they sell. So instead I attempt to get through the day as best I can. I muddle through. I struggle to maintain my composure each and every minute of my day. A day that drags on and on and gets harder and harder to get through. Each day I wonder. Each day I tell myself. I tell myself that this it is for the best. That it can’t be any other way. It has to be this way and this way only. I try to explain it to myself. I try to understand it. I try to make peace with it. I try to convince my heart that the ache, the pain, the emptiness will go away. That there will be a ‘someone’ for me, a ‘someday’ for me. That there is the possibility, however remote, of a new beginning, a new start for my failed life. Each day I try. Each day I hope. I hope you are well. I hope you are OK. I hope that I am at least a passing thought in your day to day life now. I hope you remember the things we talked about. I hope that someday we can still be friends. Each day I think. Each day I cry. I cry for the love I had to.
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