I have purchased tickets for the train to California. You are leaving this afternoon." Mom! I don't want to go away. I want to stay here with you and Daddy. Please no."My wonderful Mother slapped my face. "Shut up! You will do as you are told. Be happy that I found someone that will take a whore like you into their home."Those words tore right through my heart. My whole world crumbled that day. My Mother, the woman who bore me, was rejecting her 'sinful' daughter. I had nowhere to turn so I packed my things in silent resolution.I left my home that day, never to return. It has been ten years and I have not spoken to my Mother. Oh sure at first she would ask about me when she called her sister but she never asked to speak with me. Now too much time has passed, I cannot forgive the bitch. I have spoken to my Father on occasions but it is too sad. He is a broken man now. My Mother has ruined him. She blames him for the immoral daughter that he raised under 'her' roof. She is so fucking. He is sweet and kind and caring, but he has a history, and that has had an enormous influence on our sex life, which means we practically don't have one and haven't really for about a decade. I have a high libido, but I had mostly made peace with being my own sex-friend. I did raise the issue regularly and I still do, but between him struggling to face certain issues and other medical issues, I don't want to pressurise him and cause more hurt. Then work happened. He accepted an assignment that resulted in a lot of time away and stress to such an intense degree that his whole personality shut down. We have a good relationship though, so we coped in month three, month four, month six, but after a year, I was lonely. Really lonely. I had friends, I had my own sexual satisfaction, but I missed a truly deep connection, human to human.So I joined Lush, and made some mistakes as I learnt the ropes. I had joined to read and to write, but it was nice chatting to people in between. I even.
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