Being his sub gives me a deep sense of contentment. A feeling of being "at home". When I think about it it makes me aroused and wet. When I reflect for longer (like now) I can feel a pressure in my chest which is the bundled up feelings and overwhelming devotion. I am his sub and will do whatever He asks me to do whenever he asks me and with whomever He decides. I do not need to think about it. This leaves me free to devote my attention to doing it well. In my vanilla life I am a decision maker and a driver and impatient to get things done. When I have decided on something I go for it. Bridging this gap is something I am still learning. I have to remind myself as his sub that it is not about me. As his sub I must learn to be patient and wait until He tells me to do something. For example I would like to have some Ben wa balls so that I can train my vaginal muscles to be tight despite all the stretching they regularly endure. The vanilla me wants to rush out and buy some and start. They pulled their hoods back and Silke wasn’t astounded at all to find Riko and the beautiful older woman who she’d seen often at the inn as she’d worked cleaning. The women bowed and removed their cloaks. Silke wondered what to say, but before she could think of anything, her friend smiled, ‘Did you sleep well, Silke?’ ‘Yes, thank you.’ Silke replied a little cautiously. The older woman bowed again and began to speak. ‘My mother’s English is not as good as mine, ‘Riko said, ‘She wishes to apologize to you for our eavesdropping last night and asks for your forgiveness.’ Silke turned to the woman and bowed back, ‘Please tell her that there is nothing to forgive. I just don’t understand the reason for it, if there was one.’ When she’d finished translating, Riko said, ‘My mother asks that you bathe with us this morning. I am the one who must offer my own apology to you, my friend. Tatsuya is away until this afternoon and we would welcome the chance to sit and talk with you in the way.
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