2) You are human. 3) You can’t say the letter ‘‘P’’ without separating your lips. 4) You just attempted to do it. 6) You are laughing at yourself. 7) You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5. 8) You just checked to see if there is a No. 5. 9) You laugh at this because you are a fun loving person & everyone does it too.10) You are probably going to send this to see who else falls for it. You have received this e-mail because I didn’t want to be alone in the idiot category. Have a great Day. Laugh, and then Laugh and sing It’s a Beautiful Morning even when it’s not.“Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.”Compliments of Smokey Joe: Part 2 of lern yerself OzE Earbashing : nagging, non-stop chatterEkka : the Brisbane Exhibition, an annual showEsky : large insulated food/drink container for picnics, barbecues etc.Exy : expensiveF Face, off one’s : drunk (“He was off his face by 9pm”)Fair dinkum : true, genuineFair go : a chance (“give a bloke a fair. I didn’t know how to fly. I just drifted there seeing the light.I was keeping time by counting my heartbeats. Somewhere around a thousand I lost track. How long is a thousand heartbeats?Assuming I had a heart rate of around seventy beats per minute, I’d knock out a thousand pumps of my heart every fifteen minutes. I could still do math.After the third thousand, I realized that being a human clock was a tedious thing.I shut down and slept.The light was back. Someone should tell hospitals that the beep that the machine sitting by your bed makes is not conducive to sound sleeping. But as the incessant beeping penetrated my mind, I realized what it meant. I was alive.For all I knew, Bradley had escaped and was at this very moment getting ready to kill us all again. How did such an inept dolt get in the middle of all this? Bradley, who was laundering half a billion dollars for the mob, who had me put a laptop computer under a pile of ice in a public market. He really wasn’t smart enough.
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