If everything was good, I have to imagine youwouldn't be calling." Nothing. I mean I don't want to bother you." It's no bother. Besides, one day," he said, doing the world's worstBrando imitation, "there will come a day when I need a favor... I'llcall you with a problem and then you'll have to listen. So, I'm notbeing nice. I'm merely accumulating debt."I laughed. "Don't quit your day job. So, collecting debts, huh?" Just tell me."I then told him the whole story. Well, obviously, not the wholestory. I mean, I left out the whole 'I'm a guy, dressed like a girl'part. I just said he acted like an asshole in private about things helaughed about in public. And then I told him about the fists."What?" he said angrily. "He did what?" He didn't do anything. It was just a gesture." That piece of shit. You don't even threaten that shit. I'll flythere and fucking kill him. Let's see him try it with a guy." Youdon't even know the half of it, I thought."Calm down. I left. I'm at the Crillon, and. " Sally," dad says cautiously."And you must be James," Aunt Sally says, turning her attention toStuart, who freezes like a rabbit caught in a pair of headlights. "Youcertainly grew up to be a handsome young man, how old are you now, 23,24?" Um, I-" Stuart stammers."He's not James," I say with an air of defiance in my voice. "I'M James.Or rather... I used to be." I maintain my composure as my aunt's jaw dropsopen."Wh-what?" Aunt Sally asks with an air of anger in her voice."Four years ago I started transitioning," I explain. "To change my genderfrom male to female. Legally, chemically and anatomically, I AM a woman.Jamie-Lee Burke, nice to meet you. You may have heard of me fromtelevision?" I hold out my hand for my aunt to shake, but much to mydismay, she simply backs away from me."And- and you both APPROVED of this?" My aunt snaps at my parents,causing nearby tables to start looking in our direction."Yes we did," My dad says with pride in his voice."And do you really think this is.
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