I sure as hell didn't have any solutions ready, but Amanda apparently wasn't expecting me to."I thought about all the guys that are available, trying to decide who might be the best to 'break me in' so to speak. Colby is loyal, but pretty rigid in some of his attitudes, and frankly, no matter what orientation, I wouldn't want him thinking of me as 'his woman.' Gunther seems like a nice guy, but with the language barrier, I'm not even sure I could get him to understand. Ramon - he's good at what he does, and smart, but a Marine? Please! Jamaal, Smiley? I don't..."It was my turn to put a hand over her mouth."Just tell me how you think it will work best for you, Amanda. I think it's admirable that you're willing to do this without being coerced or browbeaten into it, and I will try my best to make it as pleasant as possible for you." Oral sex, first, I think," she said, as if she had it already planned out. "Then, maybe from behind... I mean, I'm not a virgin. Some of my partners have. .....", I said as she cut me off."Honey, your a young..... man and I understand..... the urges can be...overwhelming. I should have.....stopped", she said between sobs."I was so sad and lonely..... it felt so nice....you holding me,......looking at me. Honey I haven't had anyone look at me like that........ in a long time. It made me feel...... good and needed.......wanted !, she said still sobbing. I was getting frustrated with her taking the "blame" and talking to me like a stupid kid that didn't know what he was doing or one who couldn't control himself. With me in the shower and not facing her I felt brave in speaking out . "Mom, I knew what I was doing OK !. I think your a pretty, sexy woman. I wanted to hold you, to feel you, to...........I mean who the hell wouldn't want you. I'M NOT SORRY AND I'D DO IT AGAIN !. I stood there thinking, "OH SHIT", seems I can't control my dam mouth. It was dead quiet except for the water running, I continued to stand there thinking, "I'm Toast"..
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