Just to recap who my mother could be an identical twins with, she looks exactly like Nina Mercedes. The porn star.After she'd calmed down, she made a man out of me.We smoked some pot, she gave me a lap dance, and fucked my nine year old brains out.Well about a month or so later we found out that she was pregnant, and that's where this story begins.So there we are in the doctors office, and Mom has this smile on her gorgeous face and when the doctor stepped outside for a minute my Dad told me congratulations and that he and Mom talked it over and for the next nine months that I would be swapping beds with him, because my Mom gets super horny when she's pregnant.So we all went out to our favorite restaurant to celebrate. My Dad ordered a pitcher of beer and a ginger ale for me, when it got to the table he switched my ginger ale with the beer and after about half a glass I was toast, we ate and headed home. Mom took me by my hand and led me to OUR room. When we started getting undressed. When Laney left me, she and her lawyer gigolo were cohabiting immediately.Matters not. As they say, the optics are not optimal.I voiced my concerns to my partner. Well, she dragged some of it out of me. She knows me, okay?“Let me get this straight,” she said. “You’re worried that she’d be HERE and know that we’re doin’ it in the same house?”“Yeah,” I nodded.“But you’re okay with her staying with her mom and knowing that you ‘n’ me are doin’ it here while she’s there, an’ her mom is doing her stepdad in THAT house?” Giggle. “Do you have a geography problem? Proximity issues?”I rolled her over and kissed her. “Just love a girl who knows the word ‘proximity’.”“Stoppit!” she squealed. “We’re trying to figure out something. You have a GOOD girl for a daughter, baby. She’s had sex with one fewer guys than me. So she’s a nicer girl than I am.”“The guy you marry doesn’t count,” I said.“Then I’m a nice girl, too,” she smiled.“Very nicest girl.”“I feel like it, baby,” she returned. “I never.
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