My daughter in law Sabine always told me that I had to let my grumpy siderest. She told me the war is over you can now live to enjoy your family.It wasn't that she was wrong and I knew that it was just that I had lostall my friends and my wife was long time ago died of cancer and I felt itwas time to let go.Of course my Family felt something was wrong. Normally I always teasedthem of being wimpy and not cut out to defend the land we were supposedto protect, or fight the fights we should.Today I was just sitting in front of the old shrine behind the houselooking at the marks of my fallen comrades hanging at the branches of theweeping willow behind the shrine.Getting sleepy in the sun I closed my eyes wondering if I would wake upbefore dinner was ready.March 17, 2007somewhere in PlymouthWhen I woke up everything hurt like I was shot with bullets or cut withsword got hit with hammers or burning in napalm while my flesh and skinmelted. Opening my eyes hearing screams of pain which I. About midnight we ended up in a part of Waco I had never been to before. Block brick building with a big yellow light over the entrance. We went in the door. Looked like a hang out. Six or seven black guys, RaMon and I. We went over to an ice chest and RaMon got a beer and handed me one. We went to a card table. One of the guys told us to sit down. They were playing Texas Hold 'Em. Fuck I thought he just wanted a ride to a poker game and it will 2 or 3 hours till I suck his cock. I was a little pissed. I asked where the restroom was and I was pointed to a door in the corner. I walked into a bathroom with a urinal and a toilet no stalls. No lock on the door. I was taking care of business when a younger guy walked in and started pissing beside me. I was trying to sneak a look out of the corner of my eye. When he said "Hey there". So I turned looking and said "hey how's it going?" "Chris is the name" he said. "John" I replied as I was glancing down before turning back.
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