The lake looked very inviting. I pulled off my sweat-soaked shirt and said, "I'm hot and covered in grime and I'm gonna go for a swim. You can turn around if you need to." Oh my God, I can't believe you're doing this," she said."You know, you could also come in."She gasped, "No way." You could keep your underwear on."I could see she was considering it. Then she turned her back and said "Go on. Tell me when it's safe to look."I pulled off my boots, hiking shorts and underwear and padded down to the water. It was a sunny day and the water was warm. I started wading out, but it was shallow and muddy. After a few minutes of wading, the water was still only just above my knees.I looked back at the shore. To my surprise, Melissa had turned around and was watching me. The second she saw that I had seen her, gave a little squeak and spun around again.Now the water was finally above my waist. I called out "It's okay to look now... again."I dove under the cool water and swam further out. When I. It was an unspoken agreement we had, we were together for the sex, nothing more.Gradually the word spread that I was an easy lay, and I began to be asked to party's in some of the strangest places, always with Joel in tow. He accepted what I was doing, and as long as he took me home and got a bit, everything else I did was okay.I had read somewhere that hate breeds hate, now I knew whoever wrote it was right. I had also read somewhere, that to turn your life around you had to reach rock bottom. Little did I know how soon that would happen?The weeks turned into months. As each week passed, I began drinking more, smoking more, loosing control over my body. I was now a welcoming pit for all comers. I hated myself for what I'd become, but was unable to stop the downward spiral. Sue was the only one in the house that knew what was happening to me. Many a night after I had come home, stoned, drunk, and used, did she creep into my room to comfort me. Mum tried to help, but all she got for.
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