We’ve Got Cigarfignugen!2. Impeach THIS!!!and the Number 1 New Slogan for the Democratic Party... 1. Laid in AmericaI eat Swiss cheese. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger. -- Steven WrightThis guy is sitting at the end of the bar looking gloomy. His friend arrives and sits down beside him. “Why so glum, chum?” he asks his sad friend.“Oh, it’s my wife, she beats me at everything we compete at. Jogging, bowling, tennis, cards ... just everything.”The friend orders a beer and pauses to think. “I know,” he exclaims, “Challenge her to a pissing contest.”“A pissing contest?”“Surely you can out distance her on that ... do it on the front lawn so you can see the difference.”“Ok, I’ll do it.”So he goes home and says to his wife, “I challenge you to distance pissing contest. We’ll meet on the front lawn after dark.”So they each prepare themselves drinking lots of beverage prior to the contest. After dark they meet and the husband suggests the wife go first. So she drops her. Also, think of what you could be doing for all the other women facing the same thing. Give a little honey, to me and to them.”They walked a few more blocks and turned into an adult book shop. Inside, it appeared like every adult shop in a red-light district, but everywhere they turned they were seeing young couples, hand in hand, browsing the shelves, but looking nervous and obviously waiting. They approached the counter and handed over a ticket. The clerk mentioned in a quiet soothing voice to wait for two bells, and then all women proceed to the door in the back of the shop. After a while, three bells will signal the men to enter.So they started milling around the sex shop themselves. Nervous tension was in the air, and the women and men were averting their eyes from other couples. In a few minutes, the two tiny bell sounds rang out. A nervous panic rushed over him as he saw the love of his life turn to him and kiss him encouragingly. “We will get through this honey.” He saw her.
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