I don't think Adam wanted a relationship or anything, it was just a good time. I'm not gay, I kept telling myself. That made me feel better, at least I could pretend it did. To be honest, I enjoyed it too much to not question my sexuality. The next day at school, I ran into Adam at the gym. He acted as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. We all ran through our typical day, and come lunch time I had nearly forgot about the whole thing. Adam asked if we were still on for running after classes were over, and I froze. It seemed as though time stood still, I panicked and looked around, knowing that the others knew. Only they weren't paying any attention to us. I felt so judged by everyone, but then it clicked. They don't care. I realized then what my issues were. I had no problem enjoying another man, I just felt like everyone else did. I was holding myself to the jokes of my youth. Calling each other gay as an insult. Telling another guy to suck my cock was degrading to them. It. ” She gave me a toothy smile, and added “I think they would’ve much rather had you make them, you big stud.” I laughed as I went back to my sidework – this was the usual banter between Steph and I. I’d gotten away with it after all. A few minutes later Rachel came out of the bathroom and rejoined her sister looking like nothing had ever happened. The next half hour went normally, making coffee drinks and milkshakes, doing dishes. When I checked in on Rachel and Claire, Rachel just said “Thanks again for the shirt Drew, it was really sweet.” and Claire seemed even quieter than normal curled up in the corner, but I noticed she was watching me closely with her big green eyes. They left shortly after. Instead of giving them a bill I’d just dropped off a little doodle I’d drawn in the down time with a lame “happy birthday!” written on it, and when I was bussing the table I noticed that at the bottom Rachel had written her phone number with a few x’s and o’s. I smiled and put it in my.
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