So you know where the juice went!The nurse came in a while later, picked up the urine sample bottle, looked at it and said, “My, my, it seems we are a little cloudy today.”At this, I snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and gulped it down, saying, “Well, I’ll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time!”The nurse fainted ... I just smiled.DON’T MESS WITH OLD PEOPLE!Chinese Sex... While in China, an American man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there.A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots.Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, “I’ve got bad news for you, you’ve contracted Mongolian VD. It’s very rare and almost unheard. "Standing at the railing near the dugout, Lois leaned over the rail and motioned elaborately at the nearest man in uniform, the Orioles' hitting coach, B.J. Surhoff. He ignored her at first, but his name was on his back, and Lois wasn't the shy, retiring type. "Hey, Surhoff!" she shouted. He turned around and saw the attractive young woman, vigorously motioning for him to come near.He did come near. The fact that Lois was drop-dead gorgeous probably didn't hurt. But Surhoff, a cautious veteran of many seasons as a player, and now as a coach, kept a little distance, just in case Lois was some kind of nut.She extended Paul's note. "Give this to Vasquez, please!" she said. "It's from Paul Elias -- he's right here. Vasquez knows him. Paul's an old friend."Still cautious, Surhoff took the note and looked around for Vasquez. "He's down there," Paul shouted, pointing toward the third-base foul line.Surhoff saw Benito Vasquez, nodded, and trotted down past the dugout to where the young.
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