Chuck Norris has no mother, as crawling out of a vagina is unbecoming of a man of his stature. Chuck Norris spontaneously came into existence on Karl Marx’s birthday. This was no accident since Chuck Norris is the polar opposite of communism’s yin, and the very thought of communism makes Chuck Norris Want to puke.Chuck Norris Defender of FreedomChuck Norris has fought in every American war including the American Revolution, The War of the Worlds, Korean War, Vietnam, Desert Storm, Black Hawk Down, World War 1, World War 2, Red Dawn, American Civil War, the Iran-Iraq war (on both sides simultaneously), and the War on d**gs. The only war Chuck has not fought in was the French and Indian war because Chuck Norris could give a shit less about the French, in Chuck’s opinion the French complain to much and deserve to get their asses kicked. Chuck Norris wins by attrition.Chuck’s Favorite Foods:WhiskeySteel WoolSometimes when Chuck Norris gets tired of Whiskey or steel wool, he’ll eat. "Sandy, I don't claim to be some kind of expert or anything but maybe I could help. I mean maybe I could message your breasts and help you release enough to make you feel better." It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know by this time I was sporting and erection that could pierce steel and was glad I wore my baggiest pair of shorts. Still I could feel the swollen tip inching its way down the leg and would, if I didn't do something quick, would become quite visible. Without thinking I quickly sat beside her on the bed. "I don't want to impose on you so much, Daddy, but I don't know what else to do. My breasts hurt so much." I saw she had a towel in her lap and put it in her hands. "Here, you just hold this towel up close and I'll see what I can do to help." My hands shook as they gently pulled open her top. There before me were her two now very large hard breasts, small drops of her milk oozing .
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