“That’s,” Tatyana started to say.The rest of her sentence did not come out as the shouting ahead of us grew louder. “Keep your asses down! This isn’t some stroll. Those laser lines will cut you if you touch them. Heads down as you crawl,” a grizzled voice shouted.“What?” Tatyana asked as we heard someone yip in surprise and pain.“What? Do you need a bandaid? Is that light pain too much for you? You signed up to be in the military! I will mold you into a fighting machine. Now keep moving and keep down,” the voice continued.Tatyana and I walked around a corner and discovered that the hallway leading to our pod was being used to for training. A series of posts had been spread out across the floor. Visible red lines of light stretched between the poles. A man wearing some kind of garment colored in mottled greys and greens stood at once end of the light web shouting as several men and women wearing tank-tops and shorts tried to crawl under the light.“Faster!” the man shouted as we walked. A few days later, the chicken and horse are playing in the meadow again. This time, the chicken falls into the mud hole. The chicken yells to the horse to run and get the farmer, or the farmer's Mercedes.The horse says, "Wait, I think I can stand over the mud hole!" So, he stretches over the width of the hole and says to the chicken, "Reach up and grab my 'thingy' and pull yourself up!!!" And so the chicken did, pulling herself up to safety.The Moral of the Story?If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.For those who already have children past this age ... this is hilariousFor those who have children this age ... this is not so funnyFor those who have children nearing this age ... this is a warningFor those who have not yet had children ... this is birth controlThings I've learned from my children... (honest and no kidding!)1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house 4 inches deep.2. If you spray hair spray on dust.
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