I left her like a dozen messages."And I smile again, but it's not a happy smile, it's a we-both-know-she's-not-coming smile. And she looks down, because she knows I'm right. I take a deep breath and flex my shredded hand, which is now all nicely wrapped up. It's funny how you know that on the inside it's a mess, all shredded skin and exposed bone and everything, but when it's all wrapped up like this, it looks like nothing. It looks fine. And I guess that's symbolic or something, but I never paid too much attention in English."Look, Carls, I'm sorry I broke your window." She gives me this funny smile, which I understand because it wasn't a real window and it's such a trite thing to say."It's okay Sam, really. I'm sorry my window broke your hand." And she takes my hurt hand lightly and strokes it with her thumb. And although it hurts like hell, it makes me feel better and I don't want her to stop. And I could let it go there, but that's not who I am. I don't know when to stop."No,. She started talking in a cool manner and asked me why I read such stuff. I told her I was alone so did it. She said that she too was alone but didn’t do dirty things. My mom touched me on my shoulder and I had sparks inside me. I held her hand and said I was sorry. She told me who would take care of her as my father was away and I never pay any attention to her. I jokingly said wish I was married to her then she would not be having such problems, she just said ,achha??. I packed and left for college and all day thought of her.I came home late around 7pm and I am surprised to see all the lights on and my mother was dressed up in a bright red saree, with all make up and bangles. She asked me kaise ho and when I looked surprised, she told didn’t I say I was her husband. I looked into her eyes, they were so beautiful. I wanted to hold her but she told not like this marry me I don’t want to sin. She told me to bathe and come so that she makes the preparations. I was getting mad by now..
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