It was only an old rug that I'd had for years, I'd picked it up somewhere on my travels; I'll admit that it didn't look too good in my study, too damned small for the room. Anyway Cecilia had thrown it out without discussing doing so with me, and apparently she got a fit of the guilt's when I came home. Although she could have set the whole thing up on purpose, that's something I'll never know now for sure.Anyway I've always had this habit of threatening to put women over my knee and smack their backside (actually I always say "bum") if they do anything to upset me. Even my secretary at work gets that threat. Never carried out though; shame, she has a beautiful little bottom!Cecilia didn't tell me she'd thrown the rug out when I walked into the house that evening. She just said, "I've been a naughty girl today!" What have you done?" I demanded, feigning anger."I'm not going to tell you," she replied, and ran up to our bedroom.At the time I wasn't sure what kind of game Cecilia was. I work at a button factory. My job is to operate the heavy machinery. So basically I sit in the corner shoving my face with donuts and when my boss Mr. Penisface (yes that's his real name, but he gets mad if you make fun fo it). yella at me i press a button and the hot molten plastic pours into the moulds and forms buttons. Easy enough, right?I also own a car. It's a Toyota Camry and it's blue. It looks pretty inconspicuous. I also have a Canon Powershot g9 camera which I purchased at my local photography shop for 400 dollars, which is equal to about 250 British pounds for you British readers (so you understand the value of the money).I drive the car like this:I steer with my feet. I welded some polls on to the pedals so they're extra long and I operate them with my penis. I use my hands to take pictures of the children on passing school buses with my Canon powershot g9 camera. I also carry a Glock 19.9 mm handgun with me at all times, which I have modified to shoot tranquilizer.
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