"Come with me and I'll give you the ten-pence tour."As I said, it was a large house. In common with many large houses of the era, indoor sanitation was something of an afterthought. The master bedroom had en suite shower, basin and toilet, there was a shower-room with a basin and toilet, a bathroom with basin and toilet, and downstairs there was a toilet and hand-basin; the other bedrooms didn't have their own facilities, though two of them (the two in the attic) had a hand-basin. I pointed out that the bedroom doors didn't have working locks. The first floor (if you're American, that's the second floor, the one above the ground floor) bedrooms had locks but they'd long since been painted solid and lacked keys. The ... facilities had privacy locks with an outside coin-turn; we'd expected children and didn't want them to lock themselves in when they were big enough.The ground floor had a large lounge or sitting room, a similar sized kitchen where I usually ate, a small study or office. "She kind of seduced me, Sir." I thought I trained you better than that, Corporal."He's been calling me Corporal since I was five years-old. I'm not sure why. The same way I'm not sure why other members of my family do the goofy things they do."You know how it is, Sir."He turned back to the girls."Beth, step forward!"She obeyed and he said, "Why were you seven girls trying to cut off Amy's hair?" She cheated, Sir. And now she could be having his baby and there's no way the rest of us have a fair chance in the contest." Corporal, how many times have I told you to use a condom?" At least a million, Sir. But I wasn't expecting to have sex, Sir. I don't follow that practice on first dates, which you also taught me, Sir." I don't think I cheated, Sir." Amy sniffled. "There wasn't any rule in the contract about no sex." Maggie?" That's true, Sir. I should have known better. I know they all want to have his babies."He turned his attention back to the girls. "Have any of you given thought to.
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