"Ich wollte ... Ich dachte ... Ich ..." mehr kam ich nicht heraus.Mein Kopf gl?hte und war knallrot vor Scham. Ich stand hier wie einertapptes kleines Kind und wusste wirklich nicht, was ich sagen sollte.Die Tatsache an sich war schon schlimm genug, aber dass es sich auchnoch um eine Arbeitskollegin handelte, vor der ich mich blo?gestellthatte, machte das Ganze nicht nur extrem peinlich sondern gef?hrdeteletztlich sogar meine Existenz. Das kam mir jetzt erst so richtig zuBewusstsein. Wenn ich mir vorstellte, Miriam w?rde etwas ?ber diesenVorfall in der Firma verlauten lassen, k?nnte ich mich dort nicht mehrsehen lassen. Die Kollegen w?rden mich gewiss schneiden und vielleichtsogar zu Recht. An einen Arbeitsplatzwechsel war aber ebenso wenig zudenken, bei der aktuellen Lage auf dem Arbeitsmarkt war selbst miteinigerma?en guten Qualifikationen kaum etwas zu machen, schon garnicht, wenn man mein Alter mit in Betracht zog. Die Angelegenheit waralso weit mehr als nur peinlich. Warum hatte. "Did you think every Arab had horns? Haven't I taught you better than that? Bandanas? You speak English? Duh? God, Roddy, you sounded like an idiot," she complained."Don't! That's not fair," I protested, bristling at her suggestion, "you know I don't believe all that crap. Don't blame me if you're mad."She looked at me for long seconds before, with tears all of a sudden pouring from her eyes, she suddenly leaned into me and said, "I know honey, I know. I'm just so mad at everyone... their fucking attitudes..."Jesus, I was stunned. Mother had never sworn in my presence before. She said fuck? "It's okay Mom," I whispered in her ear as my arms engulfed her, and then waited silently as she stood trembling against me for minute after minute, her tears wet against my cheek.God, my mom's always been the strong one. The one who knows everything!I was suddenly aware of Mom's full, firm breasts pushing into my chest."I'm so sorry sweetie, I shouldn't take it out on you," she said as she wiped.
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