Inside the hut, the ceremony had briefly started with a village lady in charge and her young niece a virgin in the centre. As we arrived, the Pujari continued the ceremony. A few village elders present at the ceremony prayed and then blessed me as they left, as did my uncle.The lady asked me to take off the shirt as it was a custom in these ceremonies. She applied sandalwood paste on my arms, chest, tummy, and cheeks. The Pujari used his Ulluka (drum instrument) and the virgin in the centre started to dance her upper part of her body in a circle with her long jet black hair dancing in rhythm in every direction she turned.I was still bewildered by the ceremony and wondering why was I asked to be present. The lady asked me to be seated and offered me a small glass of diluted arrack, as an offering. In that intoxicating state, as the ceremony was unfolding, the virgin girl was asked to face me. She was asked if she was satisfied with me. She gave a ceremonial yell.Then I was made to. One of your hands runs along the side of my body over the sheet. I can see your eyes shining in the moonlight. I can see your hair spilling across your forehead. ‘You lean in to kiss me. I close my eyes and put my hands against your chest. When your lips touch mine a surge runs through me telling me that this is wrong. I didn’t invite you here. You’re my brother in law. I’m betraying my sister. I push you away, but you wrap your arms around me. You pull me to you. The bed sheet between us falls away. I feel the heat of your body against mine. ‘You open your mouth to mine and I do the same. I taste your tongue and it’s warm and wet and intoxicating. My head swims–I know this is wrong, but–Oh, yes–it feels good. It feels good to be touched this way. I feel myself becoming aroused, and that makes me feel worse. ‘Your hands are under my nightgown, caressing my stomach, rubbing my back. Your hands find my breasts and play roughly with them, and my nipples become hard under your.
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