The reality of the lines was not in doubt. Poised perfectly, totally enclosed in a calm shell of acceptance, I reached out for the lines again, for the second time. This time my conscious mind was ready for whatever the rest of my mind was leading me towards. I shifted my awareness towards the source of that pull, and stepped, without moving away from my existence.How do I describe what just happened? As a boy, just becoming a young man, its perhaps understandable that my mind can only think of something from my boyish past to use in making an analogy. In the movie Willie Wonka, one scene involves a ride in the Wonkamobile, at the end of which they get clean in the "hsawaknow", which as Willy Wonka explains, is Wonkawash spelled backwards. Only I went through something forwards, backwards, sideways and inside out all at the same time. There was a single moment in time when I felt, flat as a shadow, or smaller than an atom, or ... something. Even today I cannot find words to describe. She holds Cassie up so she can see her new seat. Once in the house she finds Jake taking a shower and dressing in the new clothes she bought for him. She sits down on the bed and brings $3500 dollars out of her purse, smiling as she thinks about Mr. Fallow bringing it to her. Hearing Jake in his room she walks in and holds her hand out. "I'll take the keys to the truck Jake, here is the $3500 for your old truck." "Jeanie we're just going to dinner, I thought she could leave her car here and I would drive the new truck." Jeanie glares at him, "Well Jake that's the third wrong choice you made today. Now when she gets here to pick you up, I want you to take all your clothes with you. You won't be living here anymore. I'm sorry that I wasn't enough for you Jake. I wish you luck in your life." A horn honks out front and Jake tosses all his belongings in a trash bag and walks out the door as Judith is coming up the walk. "What's in the sack Jakey?" Jeanie stands in the door and watches..
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