’ He stepped back, examining something that only he could see. Cassea opened her mouth to respond, closing it almost at once. {I won’t give him the satisfaction. I’ll hang here until the sun goes cold, but I won’t betray my master and my House.} ‘It would be so boring to talk to myself though, so, what’s your name?’ Her jaw set and she was was determined to say nothing, and, for several seconds she was successful. Then, the room started to orbit her, faster and faster until she had to shut her eyes to get even a slight reprieve from the bodily turmoil caused by the motion. Her stomach turned and twisted in her body making her heave. She opened her mouth to vomit, but nothing would come out. Time dragged for her as the sickness took her, certain she would die, and part of her hoping she might. ‘Forget I asked.’ In less than the space of a breath, the room rooted itself to the ground again and the retching nausea passed as though it had never been. She still stared at him as before,. But if I was honest with myself, even a little, I knew it wasn’t her. Not really. It was too easy to just let things slide or to swallow my desire after a number of rejections. If I had been able to put my supposed needs or fetishes aside, I wouldn’t be here, in the office, on my knees.And if I was honest with myself, I would have to admit that no one but me forced me to watch those videos. Or to visit those stores. Or to use that app when I was traveling for work.And if I was honest with myself, I stopped looking at her a long time ago. I started looking at the men in the gym or in our client meetings. Most men, let’s be honest, are not worth a second glance, intellectually or physically. Once in awhile though…If I am honest with myself, he could have been an ass about it. He could have used it against me or forced me. He did none of those things -- how much him being married also has to do with it, I don’t know.If I am honest with myself, it was on that trip to the conference in.
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