If I did try cocaine or heroine, I’d probably be hooked. I’ve cheated so much and lied so much about it that I can’t stop lying. Even while I’m doing it, I think to myself that I want to STOP, and I can’t even stop because I’m so mired down in it all that I couldn’t climb back up, no matter how much I want to. I’m spontaneous to the extreme, and that makes it all worse. I know where to go to get what I want, but if I can’t get it there, I keep going. I keep pushing and asking and looking until I find someone who will give it to me. I might be looking for the kind of satisfaction that doesn’t even satisfy ME, it just makes me feel better to get all of that energy out of my system and pump it into somebody else. It’s funny because growing up, the one thing I said I would NEVER do was be like my Daddy. Then when I grew up, I found out I was nearly as crazy as he was. You know what I did last week? I got back home with my husband. He’d been in the hospital sick, and the very next day,. That little taste made me crave the extreme sexual things we would be doing.FEBRUARY 19TH 2007- FIRST SESSIONUnfortunately Mistress Nikki is very popular! When I walked out of her dungeon area to set up my next appointment, I asked for the next available date. So many people were booked that I’d have to wait a week and that seemed like forever. Today I woke up with a big smile on my face, knowing that I’d finally get what I needed. My excitement couldn’t be contained and I ended up making it there about 10 minutes early. Only problem was, yes I was there, but I had to still wait. The smile plastered on my face all day got even bigger when her other appointment walked out. I knew it was my turn next. He was a very tall man wearing a leather mask. His shirt was gripped between his fingers and his back was red as if he had been whipped for the last 20 minutes. Jennifer smiled at him and told him to have a good day as he took the mask off and put it into a bag. I was almost in shock when.
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