I think about the time W/we have spent together. i think about how W/we met, and about the first time He drew pleasure from using me, and about the day He collared me, and the time since then. None of those memories contain anything which would leave me to believe He wasn't pleased with me or didn't love me or wasn't happy owning me. so why did i think He would be releasing me? After a few minutes, it comes to me - a clear thought, pushing through the mess of emotion and guilt and memories. The answer is so simple. It's nothing. He has done nothing to cause me to doubt Him. Nothing at all. It's not Him. The problem is not He. It's me. i have done something to cause me to doubt. i was thrown by the comments of the person at work, and i allowed a small seed of self-doubt to grow. As it got larger, i panicked. It is *i* who feel i am not pleasing Him, not He who feels this way. *i* feel i am not doing enough. Not pleasing enough. Not attractive enough. Not selfless enough. Not serving. He wished shehad just said it rather than keep it all awkward. However, Ron stoppedlaughing and the smile completely vanished from his face. His cheeksturned a sickly white."You?re joking!" he said, trying to form a smile again. "This is a jokeright?"Harry and Hermione looked at each other, then at Ron, nodding."How is that possible?" said Ron."Its magic, nothing is impossible," muttered Harry, feeling thesilliness of the innocent remark."I dunno what to say mate! I mean ? so you - so you?re going to be agirl from now on?" stammered Ron.Harry nodded. "It?s looking like it," he said.Ron gave a heavy breath as he felt the heavy news pile upon his back."Well don?t worry Harry, you know Hermione and I will always be here forya," he said, punching Harry?s arm."Yeah thanks," said Harry, forcing a thin crooked smile.***That evening Harry, Ron and Hermione stood in the abandoned girl?slavatory waiting for the sun to go down. Ron came across as so scaredthat he looked as if he was going to.
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